It is part of the human condition, I think, to collect and give meaning to the words others create that resonate with us. I’m a writer, but there is so much writing out there that floors me with its beauty, insight, and courage. I’ve long collected quotations that mean a lot to me, and since my transition, I’ve been more intentional about that. So I’m sharing.
Because I’m a Virgo and I like lists, I’ve categorized the quotations I save. Below are the categories and a little about each.
On being in relationship (with yourself, with another, with the world)
Being in relationship is the crux of living. This is the work—the joy—of connecting with someone, be it yourself or a loved one or a stranger, and sharing something. A moment. A spark. A sorrow. How we live with each other is, quite simply, how we live.
On risking change
I spent so much of my life being safe. Only engaging in relationship when I understood exactly what would happen, when I could predict exactly how others would react, or how the world would react. I would only try something if I was certain I would succeed. If I ever failed, it was because I did so on purpose. Risk was not something I could countenance. But change… change was something I was good at, because I would not risk a change that would not succeed.
On embracing the uncertain future
Anxiety is a real factor in my life. I’m not, generally, an anxious person, but while I don’t usually fret about whether I’ll get hit by a bus today or if I made the right comment in a conversation two days ago (really, crippling concerns for some people), I can ruminate on possible futures, and I can catastrophize. I have skills and tools to get myself out of that, but it still affects me on occasion. These quotation, about embracing possibilities, have been helpful.
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Not promised to anyone
On how to live a full, meaningful life
Sort of a gathering category, which could include the previous categories, because being in loving relationship, taking risks, embracing uncertainty, all can lead to a meaningful life. But also, there are some thoughts that are about just that, about living in a way that makes you feel full. This is for those ideas.
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Regret
On feeling complete at death
When I came out to myself at 49, it felt very much like I had wasted most of my life. It felt like death was imminent, and I had not been able to live as myself. It was a dark moment for me. So I did a deep dive into death, and this category of quotation was born. Since then I’ve found some peace in these ideas.